I want to get back with my ex – things to do before wanting to get them back

After a break up, people would immediately have the mentality of “I want to get my ex boyfriend back” or “I want to get my ex girlfriend back”. Some would immediately opt to start over and start dating again, some would often want to get back with their ex after breaking up with them.

There’s a saying that we lose things in order to gain something better. But what if we get back what we lost, but only better? Does it make sense? In a relationship point of view, breaking up with your partner is a normal yet difficult thing to do. After a break up, people would often want to move on by starting over again with new people. Others would want to move on by getting back with their ex. Now, these choices are not to be made easily. If you look at what happened to your relationship as a spectator and not the victim, you would often see the mistakes that were committed in the relationship. Saying “I want my ex girlfriend back” or “I want my ex boyfriend back” usually means that you want to give your relationship another chance. But hang on; there are things that you have to consider before getting them back:

1.) Analyze your mistakes – did you or your partner commit mistakes that caused the relationship to falter? This is the turning point of the decision to get them back or not.

2.) Will you do them again – will you commit the same mistakes all over again? Can you assure yourself or your partner that you won’t commit the same mistake twice?

3.) Value of self preservation – if your partner was the one at fault and you still want them back, ask for their assurance that he/she will treat you right the second time around if the relationship is given another shot.

4.) Value of self importance – ego is not a factor here. There was a ME before a WE in a relationship. Did you value the WE part more than the ME part? Are you terrible at being single (yes, some people are like this.)? Give yourself a chance to recover and do the first 3 steps before considering and making plans to get them back.

It’s very easy to say “I want to get my ex girlfriend back” or “I want to get my ex boyfriend back” after a break up. If you have reassessed yourself and the relationship enough to actually give it a second chance, then by all means go for it. But if there is but a single shred of doubt, then don’t commit into re-entering the relationship. Going back to your ex is a lot difficult than committing yourself into a new one.